The Nurturing Well: By Jill Starbuck
At one time or another, everyone has experienced some form of loneliness. However, loneliness is different from being alone. Alone is when you are literally by yourself and not in the presence of other people. Loneliness is a sense of emptiness or disconnection. Therefore, it can happen even when you are surrounded by people. Perhaps you’ve been to a party where you were in a sea of people but couldn’t connect with anyone. Or you’ve had a roommate that barely spoke to you. Even though you lived with someone, you may have still felt lonely. People who work from home have to take special measures to ensure they don’t become lonely from constant isolation.
While being lonely is a natural part of life, it becomes a problem if it becomes long term. Loneliness can be particularly troublesome for the elderly population. These people may have lost spouses and countless other loved ones as they’ve aged. They may have even lost the comfort of their own homes and are forced to live in retirement centers. Such disruptions can create lonely environments, robbing the elderly of their sense of identity and normalcy.
Loneliness is a very individual experience. Many times, loneliness leaves people feeling empty or unwanted. While lonely people may crave socialization, they often do not know how to bring themselves to make connections. Therefore, loneliness can bring a wide range of negative effects, some of which include depression, higher stress levels, antisocial behavior, substance abuse, and others.
If you feel that you may be experiencing the effects of loneliness, try some of the following to overcome it.
1. Volunteer. Search for ways you can help others. Helping others often gives us a sense of accomplishment and can be one of the most rewarding experiences in our lives. Try helping others who may be experiencing the same thing you are. Good places to start would be nursing homes, hospices, orphanages, and others. People in these types of institutions often experience loneliness and just need a good conversation or a nice visitor to make them feel better. Remember, a simple gesture such as a smile, a handshake, or a hug can often provide the best cure.
2. Discover your passion. Is there something that you’ve always wanted to do, but never made it a priority? Perhaps money or family was a factor. Learn what it is that makes you tick and go for it. When we love what we do, little else can interfere with our happiness. Loneliness doesn’t even come into the equation when we find ourselves enjoying what we are most passionate about. Chances are that whatever your passion turns out to be, others will be there too.
3. Get a pet. Pets provide us with unconditional love and companionship. Taking care of a pet gives many of us a purpose and something to look forward to on a daily basis.
4. Join a gym. Oftentimes, loneliness can make us neglect important parts of our lives. A gym membership can help ensure that you are physically treating your body properly. While many people can just as easily work out at home, going to a gym may give you a sense of belonging. For some people, just being around others is enough to overcome the sense of loneliness.
5. Pick up the phone. While it can become difficult over time to make connections, start by picking up the phone. Call a relative or a friend and just talk. After a while, you may feel the need to make plans and actually meet face to face. Making that first step can take you a long ways.
Long-term loneliness can create long-lasting side effects. Take control as soon as you can to reverse those side effects. Remember that there is always someone or something out there that can make you feel connected. But you have to be the one to make that first step.
