There were no questions in the Miss C question queue this week. So, instead of answering a reader question, I am going to give some unsolicited advice (and perhaps a bit of a soapbox stance). In the meantime, please feel free to submit your questions to Ask Me… Miss C. I have confidential email (AskMeMissC@gmail.com), a public Facebook page (Ask Me Miss C), or you can submit your question anonymously by sending a letter to the West Bend News to my attention.
Last week, while trying to enjoy lunch at a restaurant near my work, I witnessed the most offensive cell phone (and basic humanity) etiquette I have ever seen. It was not a fast food restaurant (though this story is no less offensive based on restaurant type). Throughout my meal, the man at the table behind me had a cell phone loudly dinging with frequent notifications. A young woman with an infant soon joined him at the table. It was his child and the mother of his child (yes they were also very loud and too easy to overhear without cell phone rudeness). Soon, his cell phone rang. He answered the call on speaker phone, with the volume very high. I (and the rest of my section at the restaurant) listened to the following conversation:
Female: Hi XXX, can I talk to you for a minute? My boss spoke to me today.
Male: Well, I am at lunch
Female: Oh, I am sorry… can you call me back when you are finished?
Male: Oh no, it’s fine. I can talk now.
Female: Oh, okay. Well… my boss came to talk to me at my desk today. He even asked me to step away from my desk so no one would hear. I got in trouble for the mistakes that XXX made, and he said that would make me at risk for losing my job. I am so upset!
Male: Oh. (And keeps eating) (Silence for a moment)
Female: I wish I could just tell on XXX, but it doesn’t seem right. I am so stressed out. And I don’t know what to do
Male: Just quit, oh and did I tell you my baby’s personality is just like mine (awkward silence)
Female: Yes… and we can talk about that more later, but I don’t have much time now and need some advice? I am having a really bad day… I need a drink!
Male: Well, don’t be getting liquored up and coming to see me tonight.
Female: What? Where did that come from? I didn’t say I would! (Awkward silence)
Female: Okay well, I gotta go.
Male: Okay bye. (Both disconnect)
This whole experience was rude and wrong on so many levels. Taking a loud call in a restaurant is rude. Taking that loud call on speaker is even ruder. Taking that loud call on speaker with the other party clearly not knowing she was on speaker phone is so far beyond rude. And not one of those behavioral examples includes the entire lack of basic empathy exhibited by this man.
Yes, Miss C offered some unsolicited advice to this man, just like I am going to now offer to you. In restaurants (and other public recreation/leisure locations:
1. Turn your ringer off!
2. Apologize in advance to your meal companion(s) if you are expecting an emergency call.
3. Keep your phone off the table while you are eating.
4. If you get a call that you do need to take, step away from your table (or even step outside).
5. And, never ever take a personal phone call on speaker where others can hear your call.
6. And if you do take that call, and for some unknown reason have to have the call on speaker. Tell your caller.
