The Nurturing Well: By Jill Starbuck
Life is full of difficult decisions and moments. Learning to let go often tops the list. For most of us, we fight change. Even those who adapt well to change or look forward to it still have to go through a process to accept that change. We get wrapped up in our comfort zones, making it hard to change what has become familiar. Yet, life is filled with small changes that we adapt to without much effort. It’s the big changes or the pieces of our life that affect us more emotionally that we struggle to let go of. Sometimes the seemingly simple things to one person are a big deal to another.
For instance, I recently cut my hair. While a haircut seems like a little thing in the scheme of things, it was a form of letting go for me. For more than two years, I was reluctant to cut my hair, with the exception of a few trims. This was because I lost half the volume of my hair due to a series of medical treatments. Losing my hair was a traumatic experience for me. Therefore, I was desperate to hold on to my hair, even bringing one of my medical treatments to a halt. After the treatments stopped, my hair started to regain its volume. Still, I wanted to hold onto it as long as I could. However, I began to notice in pictures that my hair looked less than healthy, with split ends and a scraggly appearance. I suddenly realized that all I was doing was holding on to remnants of my illness. What I needed to do was cut my hair so that it could grow back healthy instead of growing longer from the thinning process. Finally, I was ready to let go.
An inability to let go prevents us from moving forward and stifles our ability to enjoy a happier and healthier life. However, it is a scary process—one that may take a tremendous amount of time due to our fears. For some, they never let go, holding onto an agonizing cycle of an unhealthy situation. Whether it is a relationship, a job, an object, or even an emotion of some sort, if you are having a hard time moving forward, the following tips may help you make that leap.
1. Understand that you will adjust. Every person has had to let go of something at one time or another. We all get through it. While the transition may be tough, know that you will be fine in the end.
2. Surround yourself with a support group. Leaning on friends and family or people who have gone through the same situation as you are can help you deal with the letting go process. This is one of the most powerful tools you can use to your advantage.
3. Take a break. Sometimes the idea of letting go consumes us, only making us more reluctant. Taking a break and removing ourselves from the situation can help us view the situation more objectively.
4. Follow your heart. In many cases, we know when it is time to let go. We realize that a certain situation is not healthy for us. Trust your instincts and free yourself.
5. Embrace the unknown. Holding onto something that we realize we need to let go of makes it harder to move on. However, we often hold on because we are afraid of the unknown. Consider the unknown a clean slate—a new opportunity to make a difference in your life.
Letting go is never easy. However, it can be the sigh of relief that your life desperately needs.
Jill Starbuck has 20 years of experience as a business writer, editor, and market research analyst. She is a certified health coach through the Integrative Institute of Nutrition and a certified running coach through the Road Runners Club of America. She is also the co-owner of a running business. She can be reached at jillstarbuck@hotmail.com.
